The Evian Babies are the latest in disturbing ads aimed at making me want to run headfirst into an axe.
I've gone off on diatribes about the wrongitude* of babies talking or dancing or whatever other computer-generated activity they are made to do. Who needs to hear all that again? Instead, let's look at what else is wrong with this. Where are their parents? Where are the knee pads? Where are the helmets? Do they figure the bones are so soft they can fuse them back together? Are we to believe that these babies have the same musical interests as the rapping grandma from "The Wedding Singer?" The only thing I would agree with is the use of a onesie. That has to be really freeing to skate in. Think how easy it must be to land a kickflip without baggy pant legs getting in the way. Maybe we'll see onesies at the X Games. Get on it, Element.
* Also acceptable: inappropriaciousness, awfulty, jail meriting