Monday, August 30, 2010
I've been fighting this for a couple of months. Tumblr seems to be the current it place to post things so I'm moving over there. Everything from this blog has been transferred over at this point so please follow me there.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
I sat down and tried to think about what would be the most embarrassing video I could make for my daughter's classmates to find when she's a teenager. I figure a bean costume (wonderfully made by my wife), some white tights, and the word "fart" ought to do it.
I can always remind her that she smiled at me dancing in the bean costume the whole day of the shoot as she yells, "I hate you! Take it down!"
Sunday, August 1, 2010
In honor of the beginning of Shark Week, I thought I would impart things that I know about sharks that maybe you didn't. This is stuff the Discovery Channel doesn't have the time to get to.
- Sharks are looked down upon by the other fish because they lack retirement plans.
- Sharks have a great sense of smell. It results in death if exposed to a particularly vicious hot boxing.
- A great gift to celebrate a shark's 1000th kill is a 1988 California Red Chum. It looks nice in the brine cellar.
- Sharks are governed absolutely by one shark. The King Shark rules over the entire Mon-Sharky.
- The dorsal fin of a shark was originally octagonal which caused two sharks, upon meeting, to die. Darwinism eventually fixed it.
- Sharks are not allowed to hunt humans in the summer without a license.
- Sharks are blessed with one of the most beautiful singing voices of any creature on Earth but they are cursed to live in the sea with its poor acoustics.
- Of all the shark professions, from killer to super killer, the most profitable is shark dentist.
- Male sharks battle for the attention of female sharks by showing how many barrels they can pull under water. The Great "Jeff" is said to have pulled 12 for "Maggie."
- Sharks are deathly afraid of fine china. That's why there were no sharks at the Titanic sinking. That and geographic location and water temperatures.