Peeing Like A Man...Yay?

You know how gifts fall into your lap and all you can do is blog about them? There I was, conversing with friends in a mass email, when the topic of female urination came up as it is so apt to do. Anyway, Google Ads was eavesdropping and decided to offer advice.

The P-Mate! It's a funnel that cups a woman's area allowing her the masculine attribute of aimable bladder draining. Here are the simple 2 steps of instruction:

I know what you're thinking: These diagrams are only so useful. Where can I see it put into action by an actual lady (with or without head) while her dog looks embarrassed in the background?

Are you as turned on as I am?

Frankly, I like sitting to pee but, if this helps women feel equal, it's fine with me. So let it flow, my new sisters in upright urination.

In conculsion, ew.

Funny Stuff That Ain't Mine: Just For Creepy Dads and Daughters

This commercial bothers me so much. The mother isn't around, hopefully because she died and not because she couldn't take the strange relationship between her daughter and husband. I'm sure this is going to come out sexist but I don't think daughters step up in times of crisis to become the "woman of the house." If I'm in this position ever (I pray not. I don't want a daughter.), the most spousey thing my daughter's allowed to do is get a job to pay some bills. I guess it's time to scratch Electra off our list of baby names. Don't want to chance ending up like this freak family. Did they go out for dinner after this to celebrate, then throw caution to the wind and fly to Paris? I must go vomit now.