Tor's Holiday Gifts: House

For the cast of House, I would get the following:

• House - The Jimmy shoes from Seinfeld so he can work out that leg and lose the cane
• Cuddy - A Baby Bjorn big enough to hold House
• Wilson - With his girlfriend dying and all, he really needs to keep busy so a couple of new kinds of cancer
• Thirteen - For the cure for Huntington's to be sex with a black man
• Foreman - Diagnosis contest with House (first to 10 correct diagnoses wins)
• Kutner - A newly opened fifth spot on The Doctors
• Taub - A new sports car that doesn't cause you to admit to infidelity and is electric blue
• Cameron - A terminal illness to befall Chase so she can get really turned on by him
• Chase - A terminal illness with the longest life expectancy